short post

Sick...that is what I have been! Wow, sickness takes on a whole different meaning when there are little ones in tow. It has not been easy this week to say the least but I have learned and reflected on some sweet truths...1) When you need help, ASK. This is not the easiest thing for me to do always but you know it really is rewarding. It is rewarding all the way around. When I ask for help I am blessed and the ones helping are blessed. It is only pride that keeps us from this. This is blessed community...doing life together...helping one another. 2) Sometimes God allows sickness to get us to be still...this has been especially sweet because it has allowed me to really spend some time thinking about and bonding with this new little boy that the Lord is about to add to our family. I have been so busy with Zoe and just life that I haven't really spent much time really cherishing the little guy inside:) 3) God uses sickness to show us some things we need to really work on!!!!!!!!! I won't go into this too much, but wow Lord... thank you that I am still a work in progress!
I also just finished another of Ginger and I's book club reads. It was called Traveling Mercies by Anne Lamott. Great writing style, some hard material for my traditional southern baptist upbringing (which I am still recovering from), but overall glad that I read it. A few times I was really unsure about reading it but then at the end I just had this nagging thought that Jesus would probably rather hang out with someone like Anne Lamott then some religious person in denial about their depravity any day! Oh to be more and more the real thing!
That's it...all except for a huge thank you going out to the man of the year...my husband! What a servant...I am so grateful for you babe! Thank you for loving me like Christ loves the church in all her imperfections...you are awesome and I love you.

Do you Trust Me?

Jeremy and I were able last weekend to attend a worship concert called "How Great is Our God." Chris Tomlin, Matt Redman, and Louie Giglio were there all three of which I greatly enjoy due to their commitment to the Truth. We especially enjoyed Giglio's talk. He used many examples from science (ie. astronomy, and the miracle of human development in the womb) to illustrate how HUGE our God is. One thing he said really stood out to me. I don't remember exactly how he said it but basically he said that sin distorts our view of God making Him smaller than He is and us larger than we really are. How true! In our quest for security, pleasure, and power (to borrow from the Manning book I am finishing) it is all about a magnification of self that makes us bigger in our own estimation that we in reality really are. How I have known this to be true. God is Huge. He is in control. He is the Creator God and in Him, Jesus "ALL THINGS HOLD TOGETHER"~ Colossians 1:17 (another point Louie made). This was all hitting me as I sat at the concert fighting fearful thoughts about my children (Zoe home sick with a temperature and Matt in my belly so out of my control).

This is where I am weak right now. Fear over something happening to one of my little ones, to my husband, or even myself has had a tendency to really creep in. Zoe had her first major sickness this same weekend of the concert. She had a temperature so high I was scared to death. I literally just laid my hands on Zoe and just prayed several times. She had no other symptoms other than the high fever and just crankiness that it caused. And then 2 days later it was gone and she was her energetic, into everything, ever exploring and wanting to be outside self. Thank you Lord. His voice echoes in my mind..."Do you trust Me?" Even if Zoe didn't get better. Even if tragedy strikes as He no doubt said it would in this world John 16:33 (my banner verse right now), do I TRUST HIM. I want to. I want to be at peace about trouble and death...things that are absolutely a part of life. I know that this peace He has promised me because He said so over and over in His Word. Death takes on such a different meaning when you have a spouse and children. You just don't think about it the same. But again in scripture it says very clearly that He has overcome death so that He "might free those who through fear of death were subject to slavery all their lives"~Hebrews 2:15. I don't have to be slave to this fear. It is NOT of Him. I just keep hearing "Do you Trust Me." Keep saying it Lord and keep teaching me how.